Ok, so I shelled out 30 quid to go see Nigeria’s top Model and all I can say is that I wished I had saved my money for something else, considering the cab cost 35 quid to get there….AND, I had to sneak out from work cos I didn’t want to get there late. Hisses!!!!
The oyibo men at the door kept us outside for like 15mins in the freezing cold cos he couldn’t find our names on the standard list…….eventually he found it and the reason why being that for some reason my name was on the VIP list and not the normal standard list.
People on the VIP paid like 55 quid for thier tickets, so I wasn’t complaining when the mistake was made……..all the better sef.
So me and my posse quietly and quickly crept away………..
So the show was supposed to start at 7pm…..it didn’t start till like 10.30. By 10pm they were still hooking up wires and doing mic tests and by that time my tummy was making noises cos I was soooo soooo hungry. My friend Maggie insisted on telling me how hungry she was but she didn’t know that telling me about her hunger wasn’t helping mine……….AT ALL. It just kept reminding my brain about mine.
Anyways, in the VIP section there were like 7 people on a table, and each table had a bottle of wine to share……and some measly snacks which did nothing to ease my hunger……but who was I to complain about the VIP treatment…..those in the normal section had to buy their drinks……….at least I got 2 glassess of wine and a glass of Moet from a nice guy on the table who probably bought it. Cos I didn’t see anywhere in the VIP section where champagne was being offered. ;-)
The first person on the stage was someone called Tavian (?????) I’m not sure if he’s Nigerian, but he sang the Nigerian Anthem and messed up the sixth line which is “to serve with heart and might”…….he sang “to serve with all our might”!!!!!! I mean WTF?? Mate, if you must do it then do it properly.
The there were some support acts that I won’t bother talking about……..all I remember about the performance were the girls shaking their assess on the stage…..which happened quite a lot……..
Finally the show started with the introduction of the girls and I was saying to my friends that I thought these girls were meant to be models?
Out of all of them, probably like 3 or 4 had model bodies…….one was even 5’5 and a bit overweight sef…….the slim ones had big tummies and again I was like WTF????? These are supposed to be models here………….!!!
Some more support acts…..some more dancing, then it was swimwear time……and booooooy, what a laugh……..
In true style, the hall scattered with people shouting……I mean these girls bums were bursting loose from their pants……..H-I-L-A-R-I-O-U-S!!!!!
I think they were very much behind schedule, cos they didn’t have one-on-one interviews with the models….. I actually heard today that some of them are British-born; see me thinking they were straight off the boat.
Anyways, all the models came out for their final walk in their Adebayo Jones collection and Ifeoma Ilobi who represented Miss Anambra fell on her face flat…….and in true Nigerian style, the whole hall scattered a bit more….. I genuinely felt sorry for her. I felt even more sorry for Adebayo Jones (who was on the judges table by the way) who must have died a little inside when he saw his beloved dress was probably torn.
Oh, did I mention that there was some Calabar dancing troupe as well…..who insisted on their choreography not matching and some dancing off beat……
At one point I mentioned to my friend that the whole show felt like back in the day when we used to go to other schools for Senior Lit and Interact…..with the whole fash pa and miming……and with a large cloth covering the back stage and the contestants behind dressing up…… we were just praying that the cloth didn’t fall off……now that would have been embarrassing!
Anyways, we were just waiting for the show to be over so we could get the hell out of there……I was so hungry that I couldn’t wait to get home and eat indomie and egg…..
The organizer of the event came out and gave her speech and said her thank yous and all in that husky baritone voice of hers and insisted on calling out the poor Miss Anambra and giving her flowers……
She was like; “Did you see the way Ifeoma fell”? “And what did she do? She got up and continued walking”…….
And we were like, what else would she have done? Would she have just laid on the floor or something? Or crawled out on her legs and hands??
I just couldn’t understand why she insisted on embarrassing the girl further……..poor thing.
Anyways, the crown went to Miss Lagos State….who had her own supporters club making noise for her…… I do wonder though, if she will actually make it as a model….. I mean she isn’t really Nnenna sha…… but yeah, the show ended at 3 in the morning…..instead of 2…..and yes, I still wish I hadn’t wasted my money.